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Post by emilytrombone on Nov 4, 2005 15:09:25 GMT -5
My bd hit his hand on a stand while conduting last year and came out with FUZZY NUGGETS It was quite funny at the time, but a couple weeks later one of the 'bones dropped their slide and yelled the same thing. Our piano player went in to explain exactly what fuzzy nuggets ment and what it refered to.
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Post by woodwindchick on Nov 4, 2005 21:35:13 GMT -5
(All right, so yesterday all the jazz band members received our jazz band sweatshirt. Me and a couple of my friends decided that the fact that all of us had the exact same sweatshirt made us like a cult and told the other jazz band members. This resulted in over half the jazz band standing in a circle in the storage room. Now you have some background information on this quote.)
Joey: We need a sacrifice! (grabs a clarinet player) Suzie: Hey! Lauren: No! You are NOT sacrificing anyone in my section! (pushes Suzie out the door) Be free! Joey: Fine. But we at least need a chant. Brad: I have an idea.... (later) Brad: Okay, we need a chord! All: (sing various pitches) Brad: No! Too happy! All: (fix pitches to make it minor) Brad: Better. Now, chant! All: One, flat three, four, sharp four, five, flat seven, one. (pause) (cheer wildly) Me: I think that was the coolest thing we've ever done.
Me: (in a high-pitched voice) Amie Amie Amie Amie! Amie: (also high-pitched) Megan Megan Megan Megan! Joey: This is what you hear before you die.
Brad: Taylor, you're not wearing your sweatshirt! Me: I think we should ex-communicate him. Brad: Hear that, Taylor? You're being ex-communicated.
BD: (telling us about a fundraiser opportunity) Brad: What day is it? BD: The sixteenth. Brad: But that's LHS Band Day! BD: Yeah, and...? Brad: You're making us work on a holiday!
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Post by hchswiregrasshorn on Nov 5, 2005 1:03:55 GMT -5
We've had a few funny ones recently, although i can't remember them all.
G.W (baritone): People say that "Nimrod" from the Enigma Variations was written about me. Me: Yea, If you'd write a piece about yourself, the lowest trumpet pitch would be an A above the staff.
Bd: Come on Flutes, play. Feed your instrument your starving them. S.E (flute) Yea, look how skinney mine is.
Bd: Ok guys Do You Hear What I hear. S.E: I don't hear anything.
Bd: Your a Mean One, Mr. Grinch. S.E: Don' t talk to me like that. Anyone in band: W.J. (me) I need a piece of music. Me: Ok. I'll do it to the best of the library's ability.
Bd: Ok, pull out Canto. D.C (bass clarinet): I can't play that 1st phrase. G.W(baritone): You "Can too"
G.W: I think Mr. S has a facination with ugly people. Bd: How's that? G.W: Well, this year we did Phantom of the Opera, and we may do Hunchback of Notre Dame next year.
Football players: Why doesn't he band go to the playoff game in northern Alabama. Me: Well, we have to pay for our own gas, and we don't have charter buses. Plus we probably get there after halftime and we'd mabe get to play one song because of the strict penalty we'd get for playing during plays. Plus I'm not gonna waste my time and money to watch our a** get beat( Which happened. They lost to the DEFENDING STATE CHAMPIONS 48-6)
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Post by woodwindchick on Nov 5, 2005 1:12:51 GMT -5
Amie: You sat on my oboe! (picks up the case and hugs it) Joey: I think it's fine. It needs to lose some weight anyway. Amie: No it doesn't! It's an anorexic clarinet! Joey: MEGAN'S an anorexic clarinet. Me: Hey, I'm not a clarinet, I'm a flute!
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Post by babette2009 on Nov 5, 2005 17:42:25 GMT -5
Taylor: It'd be kinda cool to have only one arm. Me: But then you wouldn't be able to play your instrument! You need both arms! Unless you play trumpet, I guess. That kinda in a way is funny, but kinda not, because there is a boy in our band that is missing one hand...he just has a thumb at the end of his arm...the thumb is virtually useless.
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Post by babette2009 on Nov 5, 2005 19:09:07 GMT -5
A trumpet player in our band looks like Harry Potter. That's too weird. We USED to have a trumpet player in our band that looked like Harry Potter.
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Post by ittybittybone on Nov 5, 2005 19:12:50 GMT -5
"Contrary to popular belief, you have a heart."
That's what my retiring section leader told me tonight, after our final show, the Wizard of Oz.
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Post by trumpetskickbrass on Nov 6, 2005 23:25:43 GMT -5
I have a few. we went to BOA Super Regionals in San Antonio yesterday so heres some stuff we said
*walks over to micheal* Jerimiah: hey micheal, ian buckler wants to drink ur cheesy blood Micheal: lay off the pot my friend *comes back to us* Jerimiah: i managed to make u sound like a total **** and make my self sound like a pothead at once
Ian: *brings out rock star energy drink* Jerimiah: chug it Ian: *starts chugging it* Jerimiah: now go run into the street Jerimiah: do it Jerimiah: do it Jerimiah: doooo iiiitttt Ian: *starts laughing and some rockstar come out his nose*
*band with colorguard dressed as birds come out* Ian: GO BIG BIRD
Chris(Ians bro): Ian, you look so gay like that Ian: *turns around in his seat*...*gets cell out with a certain recording on it* *turns around and yells to chris* "Chris your gay, we have proof!!!!!!!!"
Me: OMG, THEIR COLORGUARD IS ALL BOYS!....AND THEY LOOK LIKE 7TH GRADERS!!! Ian: thats not their colorguard! those are probably the alternates!!! Me:......OOOoooooo......... Ian: o my gawd *sigh* *shakes head*
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Post by musicscifigirl on Nov 8, 2005 15:03:58 GMT -5
There's an announcement on the board about Flags. Kes was reading it today and she said the funniest thing!
Kes: "Practice on Wednesday for Girls and Cory..." Why can't they just say "girls"?
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Post by Duel of the Flutes on Nov 8, 2005 15:47:38 GMT -5
yesterday at Band-O-Rama, some 6th grade percussionist left their bell kit sitting in the middle of the gym floor in a very inconvienient location.... BD: okay, you seven (points to seven people, including me), go get those stands and put one per two chairs for the 6th grade... me: *goes to get stand, heads over to 6th grade setup and trips on bell set* AAAAAAHHHHH! BD: ...without killing yourself
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Post by Flutist Kes on Nov 8, 2005 15:59:23 GMT -5
BD: Give me your music. Me: But... I need it! For pep band! BD: No, you're playing alto sax. Me: ... WHAT?! Flutist: Awww, you're making her cry, Mr. S! BD: Oh, she is not. Me: :bigcry: BD: Oh, wow, she is...
Yeah, and I totally was not faking it... I think it shocked me more than anything. Definately wasn't expecting him to place me on alto. 'Specially since I'm way much more of a flute person. And I'm not ready for marching alto music. Way too low. I feel really bad about crying then now. He was just trying to give me more time to practice my skills... but I do NOT want my new alto in the stands! And I don't have any music, or lyre, or flip folder, or anything... so I would have to go buy it... And I love my flute... and he just was like, "You're not playing flute, you're playing sax." Just right there... so suddenly... So, yeah, I cried. And then he said I could play flute if I really wanted too. Which I so totally do. But I'll probably try to do half and half. The bigger half being my flute.
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Post by Duel of the Flutes on Nov 8, 2005 16:07:55 GMT -5
^ I'll let you use my alto, if it makes you feel better. then you won't have to worry about destroying it, 'cause my brother used to do all sorts of horrible stuff to it. (including but certainly not limited to: chewing gum while playing, putting it key-side down, dropping it, and putting it in places that are not instrument-friendly) but it still plays, and is an awesome sax. with pretty engraving. (lol) you can use my lyre too, and I have a folio that I bought for two bucks (cheap one) the day before Band-O-Rama last year... I bet I completely ruined your excuse as to why you can't play alto. oh well. you know, if our bd was actually smart (aw, that was mean, but I'm making a point here), he would've made me play alto. it'd be so much easier, because I actually wouldn't complain. but I dunno... what flutes are doing pep band from your band? only me and my second chair are doing it in ours. (I love calling our flute section "my flute section" and section people "my 2nd chair" or "my last chair", etc. it's my own special way of showing affection for them. and to think, I wouldn't technically be able to call them "mine" if I wasn't first chair, and I HATE first chair!)
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Post by Flutist Kes on Nov 8, 2005 16:41:34 GMT -5
Oh, I dunno. I think he meant basketball games. But he meant every single time. And that would suck. BUT HE STILL TOOK MY STAR SPANGLED BANNER! Ah, well. Not like I don't know it or anything.
But he's making all the 6th hour flutes stick with their jazz instruments... which makes no sense... because then we have about 2 flute players (L. R. won't play flute). And that's not enough to be heard over the trumpet section.
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Post by Duel of the Flutes on Nov 8, 2005 17:05:35 GMT -5
er, so it's just me and musicscifigirl? ??
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Post by Flutist Kes on Nov 8, 2005 18:29:42 GMT -5
Apparently that's what he wanted. But he's not gonna force me, so I still get to play flute... I'll probably do it (flute) during songs like "Final Countdown," "Victors," "Funkytown..." stuff where the flute part is different and MUST be heard. Unlike Satisfaction. Which is the same as the trumpets'. So, yeah... I'll probably mesh my music together or something, so I'll end up playing sax the first half and flute the second... hahaha...
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