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Post by bandveteran2008 on Dec 30, 2008 23:18:00 GMT -5
Actually I am happy for him but I am also worried that he might move and abandon the band or worse stop thinking of us as his kids.I mean he always his of his band students as his sons and daughters and he loves and protect us just like that. but I am worried that he might stop once he gets married. He is my 2nd father figure/friend and I don't want to loose that. Does this make sense?
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Post by stickshifty on Dec 31, 2008 1:18:39 GMT -5
When I was a freshman in high school, the assistant bd got married (and invited the whole band-- all 280 of us to his wedding). Other than wearing his wedding ring and bringing his wife to competitions and concerts and being really happy, he was no different. He still looked to his mellophones as his "children" because they didn't have children immediately after getting married.
I even saw him last night at Kohls' picking out things for his first son that was born on the Dec. 26th. It was an "awww" moment. And then he made sure I was working his band camp (since he has moved on to be head director at another school). So good, professional relationships can exist post-marriage.
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$@M1K1N$!
Band Nerd
I'd rather be at band
Posts: 149
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Post by $@M1K1N$! on Dec 31, 2008 17:40:49 GMT -5
Yes I agree, awhile ago (with one of the assistant BDs) he got married, and other than being gone when his kids were born, he didn't change one bit. So I think it'll end okay.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 31, 2008 22:29:42 GMT -5
My director was married when he got here, but he's either had two kids (that is, his wife has) since he's been here, or he's had one kid since moving here and one was an infant when he got here. The only problem I can foresee is if he has a spouse that doesn't understand band and wants him at home all marching season. In that case, he will either give in and not have rehearsals, or not give in and have potential problems at home.
Otherwise, I would say that married directors=not much difference to the band. It's an extra chaperone, and someone to keep the BD sane when his band isn't up to par. Our BD's wife rarely-if-ever turns up at competitions, but she's unusually shy and has two kids to deal with (since BD is doing, well, band stuff), so I would imagine that that is the reason.
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Post by NinjaBaker on Jan 2, 2009 21:02:32 GMT -5
I understand where you're coming from.
My band director was married before I came to hs, but his first kid arrived my sophomore year. I was worried that we'd lose him, but no. He and his wife are too big of band nerds for us to lose him. Since then, his wife and kids ( he had another between my jr and sr year) have come to practically EVERY contest and his kids are practically our kids.
Oscar is right. A spouse will keep a BD sane when things go crazy.
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